One thing most people don’t know about me is that I am a big ole nerd. Not in a cute or sexy way either, like a play-by-the-rules, dinner before dessert kind of way (except in the actual case of dessert; it’s just a metaphor, y’all).
I take school very seriously. I cheated on something, once, in the sixth grade, and I cried about it for four-ish days. Part of the trauma was because, even to this day, I am a massive teacher’s pet. Of course, I got caught. While I’m not above a little homework assistance that maybe doesn’t fit the exact tutoring specifications, I don’t play around with serious honor code violations. I am not as bad as my friend Emily Garbutt, though. If Emily was in a bizarre, Saw-like situation where she had to cheat on a test to save her own life she would probably at least vomit. I don’t think she would die, but she would be extremely uncomfortable. I choose to take a lot of classes with Emily because even though she freaks me out when she talks about studying for tests two weeks in advance, she’s a really good influence.
People who follow me on Instagram and don’t read my blog (sticks in the mud, all of them) don’t know that my social life is not as intense as it seems. Many people, upon seeing me after a while, will say something like It looks like you’re going to a lot of theme parties he he he with this weird, raspy Frenchman-lurking-behind-a-tree laugh at end like it isn’t rude to make value judgements based on social media. The secret is that I post something Every Time I Go Out. True socialites don’t do that because they’re out so much they would probably overwhelm Instagram’s servers but I have to because I go out (leave the house at all) probably half as often. I own six independent photo editing apps so I can make the one blurry photo I took look good because I have an accounting test and this is my one shot at relevancy this week. D-List stars that get a lot of plastic surgery and I: we’re not so different.
In closing, I would like to say that I stayed up sort of late applying for internships and I’m on a new flossing kick. Even though I try to pretend I am fun and flirty I am actually just that girl in the second grade who had to wear blue retainers full time and take them out at lunch, leaving a spitty puddle on her tray (this actually happened for nearly 3 years and my friend Connor will never let me forget it).
Retainers still dutifully in,
Megan
September: Football is back. I go to Dallas with Ferons to watch the opening game. I’m at a point in my life where I have $100 to spend on a football game, a feeling which is now foreign to me. This month is good but feels really long. Month rating: 8/10
October: I turn twenty, my family comes to visit me, and I come home for Halloween. Time really starts to pick up and I’m not sure if it’s because I’m old now or the semester is just really busy. Month rating: 8/10
anything for a joke 